Monday, September 14, 2009

Happy Birthday Baby!

My baby is 6! I can hardly believe it. I asked him, begged him to stay 5 and he said "why would I ever want to do that?" :) That kid is so funny. I can remember everything about the day he was born. I told him about it again today and he thought it was great that he was very blue when he came out. I did not find it at all funny! I remember my mom screaming about it and freaking out. The only reason I didn't jump off the table was my sister W was in the room too and she wasn't freaking out (she knew if she did I would have lost it!). The cord was wrapped tightly around baby N's neck and he couldn't breath. Once they got it taken care of he screamed like crazy and pinked right up.

I knew he would be my last. I loved being pregnant and having babies but D and I agreed two healthy boys was plenty. Little did I know we would not be raising our babies together. I know my "age" would allow me to have more but I am most certainly done. I love my boys like crazy and they are enough. BUT, it is going by way too fast. I spent too much time while they were growing up dealing with the "end" of relationships - wasting time on things that aren't worth it. No more of that! This last year has been such an awakening for me.

Today N wanted brownies for his class so I made them last night. Finished just in time to realize E still wasn't ok. Fever all day and just all around blah! We picked N up from school and came home and did some of his homework. Birthday boy picked dinner - homemade cheeseburgers, BBQ chips, root beer and more brownies. Poor E took a couple of bites and is now throwing up again. :( This is when I hate the guilt of being a single working mother. I want to be able to keep him home as long as he needs without wishing he could go to school because I NEED to go to work. I can do some from home but I really need to be in the office. It is a terrible thing to balance the needs of your children and the financial needs of having a job! I hate that he is sick and I hate needing him to get better just as much as I want him too. I am praying HARD that the rest of us do not get it. PLEASE! My parents are still sick so I hate to ask them to come sit with him and PDT is useless to even try. Not to mention E just wants me to sit next to him on the couch ALL of the time or he cries. I have watched a lot of Disney channel today.

I did get to go outside and play Moon Sand with N for a little while. That was his birthday gift today. He loved it. I think he had a great day and bearing any future disasters Sunday will be his little party at our house. Our first party in our new house. :)

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